I haven’t done a blog post like this in a while. For the past few months, my anxiety has been on the high side. And if you’ve ever experienced anxiety, you know it’s awful, and it can just take over your body at the most random times. I was out watering my flowers a few weeks ago, and out of nowhere, my body started shaking, and I felt like I was going to start crying. It’s one of those things where no matter how great everything is around you, anxiety will hop in at any moment. I try to make my blog a happy place, so it’s not often I share this side of my life. I feel it’s important to share a little about what has been going on today to help someone else struggling with the same.
I have been working to really control my anxiety the past few months, and some of the things I’ve been doing have definitely helped out a ton. With that being said, if you are going through any anxiety or depression, it’s in your best interest to talk to your doctor. They’ll have the best plan for you, but I’m sharing some small changes I made that have helped me control anxiety on my own. You don’t even have to be in your 30’s to follow this list. If I would have started following these things in my 20’s it would have helped me a lot.
When I turned 30, I promised myself that I would put my self-care and mental health first, and that’s what I’ve been doing. You would think that putting yourself first is easy, but it’s not. And if your love language is acts of service, you know what I mean.
Fifteen Ways to Be Happier in your Thirties
1. Get rid of clothes that don’t fit anymore.
This was a hard one for me. Not only because I thought my older clothes were cute, but I didn’t want to give up hope that I might fit them one day. After years of eating healthy, drinking water, my coffee black, counting macros, exercising, going to bed early, and not losing one pound, I realized my body was content with where it was at. Every doctor told me that I was healthy, so why did I still think I needed to be a certain BMI? There are days when I hate how I look but doesn’t everyone have those days? The best thing I ever did was toss out the clothes I’ll never fit into anymore. It helped me take away the pressure to lose weight, and it helped me love my body’s set weight. It does feel good to wear clothes that fit, and sizing is nothing but a number. It’s important to accept that your body/metabolism does, in fact, change as you get older, and it is out of your control. No one cares what you look like as much as you care what you look like.
2. Accept that not everyone is going to like you.
This was a big one for me, especially after spending more than a decade in front of the internet. If you worry too much about what others think, you’ll lose who you are. You’ll alter your personality or thoughts to please others, and that is exhausting. Being yourself is hard when you’re worried about how others will think of you. The best thing is to accept that not everyone is going to like you. It doesn’t mean you’re doing anything wrong or that you should change anything you’re doing. The people that do like you will like you for your authentic self, and those are the types of people you should surround yourself with in life. And it goes the other way too, you are not going to like everyone, and that is ok!
3. Don’t waste your time doing things that you don’t want to do.
I’m trying to get better at this. I’m a yes person, but also an introvert at times. I get excited when it’s doing things that bring me joy, like visiting coffee shops, walking around a cute town, planting flowers, playing tennis, picnic, or sitting at the beach. Things like going to bars, football games, or parties bring more dread than anything. It’s hard to say no when you don’t want people to be upset with you or think you’re a flake, but at the same time, don’t waste your time doing things that don’t bring you joy. This doesn’t mean you don’t like the person for saying no; it’s just you’d rather be doing something else with that person. It would be best if you gave a little here and here, but you don’t always have to say yes.
4. Let go of friendships that don’t bring purpose to your life.
This is one of the toughest ones. You can love a person but also know when it’s time to let go. Friendships, even best friends, sometimes have an expiration date. It doesn’t mean either did anything wrong; it just means that people grow into different people as the years go on. If you find yourself clashing with a friend or not finding joy in the same things anymore, just let go. I have love and respect for every relationship, past and present, in my life, but moving on and growing separately can be one of the healthiest things. Some people linger in friendships because they feel like they have invested so much, but maybe it’s time to cash out on your investment and put your energy into something different. And the best thing to do when letting friends go is to hold no hate in your heart, not anger, no regrets, and to remember the amazing moments spent together. 5. Fix what you don’t like
From a vanity standpoint, I have absolutely hated my teeth for twenty years. I have finally started the process of having them fixed. I hated smiling in photos on my right side because of the gap; I felt like my teeth were smaller than a toddler’s, and having them fixed has made me so much more confident. It’s something I wish I would have done in my twenties. This two-hour dentist appointment should have been scheduled years ago (let me know if you want a post about it!), but people go through life-hating things that are so easy to fix. Right now, I’m in the process of removing my tattoo (it doesn’t serve me anymore, and I regretted it), and I also had a few moles removed. Why spend years hating things that you can fix within minutes. I know it doesn’t seem like it’s important to fix things, but if it makes you happy, do it!
6. Don’t talk about other people.
This is something I have been trying to do. Gossiping is easy, and pointing out other people’s flaws helps you forget about your own. Talking about other people may feel good at the moment, but it’s toxic and brings absolutely no value to your conversations in the long run. I mean, Cady Heron said it best “Calling somebody else fat won’t make you any skinnier. Calling someone stupid doesn’t make you any smarter. And ruining Regina George’s life definitely didn’t make me any happier. All you can do in life is try to solve the problem in front of you.” If you don’t know that quote, you need to close his computer and watch Mean Girls. This goes with the understanding that you’re not going to like everyone, but try not to show it. It doesn’t cost anything to be kind. I think it’s important to mention that talking bad about yourself is also a horrible habit to get yourself into. Manifest good thoughts about yourself and don’t talk bad about yourself to others. It will have them questioning those same thoughts about themselves.
7. Make time for self-care.
This is a big one. It’s easy to push off appointments and ignore things that bring you joy, but make time for yourself. Take hot baths, read a book, watch a movie, don’t cancel your doctor appointments (yearly physical, dermatology, dentist, eyes, obgyn), get a massage, and do things that help your mental health. Sometimes, I’ll lock myself in the bathroom and do a hair mask, face mask, listen to a podcast, take a hot bath, paint my nails, pluck my eyebrows, shave my legs, and I always feel like a million bucks after. Another essential self-care thing you can do is start going to a therapist a few times a month. This can benefit anyone! You don’t have to have anxiety, experience anything dramatic, or feel sad to talk to a therapist. Believe me; they’ll find something that you’ve been bottling up. Counseling is so important for mental health, and it’s helped me so much in my life during the hardest times. I don’t always like talking to family/friends about deep-rooted issues, and it’s better to have a professional and unbiased person there for you.
8. Start eating more vegetables and drink more water.
I don’t know what happened, but I’ve gravitated towards more cheese and frozen chicken nuggets this past year. I’ve been trying my best to drink more water and eat more vegetables. They have the best source of vitamins, and they do great things for your skin/health! I feel better when I fuel my body with better nutrition, but it is also important to treat yourself to the chicken nuggets and cheesecake now and then! I’m always an advocate of intuitive eating and moderation. But vegetables and hydration do help! My doctor actually told me that staying hydrated could reduce anxiety levels, and I think she’s right! Water is good for your skin, organs, and brain function. 9. Travel
I used to think that traveling was for your twenties. It’s not. Travel as much as you want and as often as you can. You don’t have to spend thousands flying to Mexico or Italy. Take a little road trip to the town over, go to the beach, sit at the lake, get out of town and see something new. I always feel happy and refreshed after taking a trip. I can’t wait to travel more this summer!
Not a day goes by where I don’t exercise. You don’t have to do anything big or strenuous, but one hour of movement every single day is one of the best things you can do for your body. My form of exercise is walking and tennis. I know that my anxiety levels are so much better after a long walk or a dose of endorphins. And as Elle Woods said, “Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people don’t shoot their husbands.” To me, gardening is also a form of exercise. It’s a lot of hard work, and I’m always getting my steps in and my heart rate up while walking around the house. I am also going to get back into yoga next week since our yoga studio has opened up.
11. Go make up free
I’m a huge advocate of makeup-free days. Putting makeup on is actually my least favorite thing to do. I enjoy cleaning more. 6 out of 7 days are makeup-free for me. I think it’s important to embrace yourself without mascara or foundation covering up beautiful freckles, spots, and who you are. It’s also important to let your skin breathe. I don’t know what it is, but having no make-up makes me feel so much freer. Sometimes it’s easy to hide behind makeup, but you need to love every part of you. You can forget how naturally beautiful you are if you hide it too often.
12. don’t compare yourself to others (beauty/work life)
There is no timeline for where you need to be when you’re thirty. You don’t need to be married, you don’t need to be on your second or first child, and you don’t even have to have your career figured out yet. Don’t stress over a timeline just because the people in your life are ahead or behind you. Comparing your looks to others can also be dangerous, which is why I love the no-makeup days. Don’t look at others and think they have better hair, plumper lips, and no wrinkles, better cheekbones because honestly, you are made beautiful the way you are. I bet people are looking at you saying the same things about your beautiful traits. There isn’t much transparency online either, so comparing yourself to a highlight reel is pointless. Someone may now look at my photos and go, “wow, she has no gap in her front tooth” Well, we all know now that it was fixed, and it wasn’t something I was born with. We are not all made to look like each other or have the best of the best. When you stop comparing yourself to others, you’ll feel a rush of freeness. 13. have social media free days.
These are so important. If you feel like you’re comparing your life, wanting more, or feeling down about social media, take a break. Most days, I take a photo of my food or something I’m doing, post it on my story, and immediately get off the app. I don’t spend time scrolling, and I always have much better days. I don’t want to feel bad about not hustling, not having the newest clothes, or not sitting on a beach in Tulum. Break free from social media as often as you can.
14. Less alcohol
This is something I’ve never had a problem with. I think it’s nice to sit on the porch with a glass of wine or a frozen cocktail by the pool now and then, but it’s never anything I crave. I never end a day going, “dang, I need a glass of wine.” I don’t drink wine to celebrate, and I don’t find joy in getting drunk. I hate how it makes me feel the next day, and I would rather drink a gallon of Kombucha or sparkling water over wine. I think having to have a drink every single day is problematic, and I stand by that. I think alcohol causes more problems than good in life. I’m not against it, just not dependent on it. Now, coffee, you won’t take that away from me. Cutting back on alcohol will help your mood, sleep, your skin, and energy.
15. Organize your surroundings
I’m still trying to be better at organizing my surroundings, but I let things go now and then. Keeping your spaces in your home, finances, and work-life organized can reduce so much stress. Every week, I work to organize one thing in my life. It may be a closet, a drawer, or even writing my events in my calendar. Staying organized keeps me feeling more grounded and less scatterbrained. I hope you can take a few of these tips from this blog post and apply them to your weekend. There are so many things I know I can be better at, and each day I thrive on being just a tiny bit better than before. ♥️
Questions for you
- What is something you’ve been doing to be happier?
- What is one thing on the list you could apply to your life?
- What are you currently struggling with right now?
This blog post is exactly what I needed right now. I especially am relating to #1! I’m in my thirties and I’m the biggest I’ve been in my whole life and have been struggling with trying to lose weight. I know that getting older you tend to gain weight and my crazy hormones are no help but I’m still definitely considered overweight. I scheduled my first doctor appt in years for July and hope she can help me figure out how to slim down and most importantly feel better. Anyways your first tip definitely is a game changer! I did get rid of a lot of clothes that I was waiting to fit into these past few years and wow! I feel great getting rid of them! And new clothes that actually fits is so much better than trying to fit into some dress that’s probably out of style!
Thanks for the tips! They are all so helpful and genuine! Love this post!
Love that you’re being proactive about things that you need to do. Going to a doctor is the best first step! And if you arent happy with your doctor visit, go to another! It took me a few doctor visits to find someone who would listne to me.
Love all of this!!
Right now with life so busy, I’m just trying to stop and take a breath here and there to think about all of the things I’m looking forward to. Really the reason for working so hard right now!
All of it 🤪 the getting up/out and moving is a big one that I need to work on! I can’t wait to have a house and to just be able to walk out the door.
Anxiety is also huge for me right now. It’s the mix of jobs/school/internship that’s throwing me over the edge, but it’ll start to be better once our house is done – hopefully end of summer! I can do this!
Taking deep breaths seriously works! I love your positive attitude with everything being thrown your way. I KNOW YOU CAN DO IT GIRL!
I have to say, I love it when bloggers are real with their readers. And this is a real post with real feelings and real difficulties and real advice. Thanks for that.
Thank you, Laure! That means so much to me.
1 Followong your advice (you are such a great inspiration. I want you to know that and please never stop writing – You are great in that)
2. Eat healthier and exercise
3. Stressful job :/ eating too much junk food because of the stress caused by current situation
I am proud of you Tara, that you decide to follow the happy side of you. Everybody has their struggles and problems but it is Us who decide how we choose to react to them. 🙂 everybody has a choice. Thank you for your writing. You are such a beautiful soul. 🙂 I can see your progress. I feel that Taralynn gets more mature and it is beatiful to see how You develop. I am happy that you want to share yourself with us. 🙂 You are great. Keep going on.
Lots of Love 🙂
I appreicate those sweet words, Kamila!
Almost all of us have been diving into junk lately, especially being at home! You’re not alone with that one.
So true… 😉
This is all SO true!
I’ve found that adjusting my work ambitions to be about what I truly want, instead of what I think I should want, has really helped me. I’m still really successful in my job but not constantly chasing progression in salary/title, instead just enjoying feeling like I’m learning more, and love my work/life balance!
From this list I do need to drink more water for sure!!!
I still really struggle with comparison – I never feel slim, or wealthy, or cool, or pretty enough vs others and I know it’s silly because no one else really cares!
I need to be drinking more water (less coffee) as well.
I think we all deal with comparison especially in this social media universe we live in.
Oh my goodness, I just had a meltdown…I understand the anxiety! I go thru my belongings all the time, if it’s not worn or I don’t t like it…it’s out! I am struggling to fit back into a work routine, last year changed everything and I am super anxious…not about covid..about getting out in the world again
I think many are going though that right now! This pandemic definitely put a punch into the way we live our lives and we just have to learn to relive them! ♥️ take care of you!
I absolutely loved this post ! I’m 41 years old and I agree 100 percent with everything you said . Very well written . Love your new smile , your a beautiful person and always do what makes you happy !
Thank you, Chassidy! ♥️ Means so much!
Thanks for sharing, Taralynn! These are definitely tips that could help anyone. I try to clean at least one thing a day (even if it’s small) because I always feel less stressed in a clean space. I also am much happier when I end the day with a gratitude list, just writing down the things that made me smile during the day, small or big. Even if I can only come up with a couple it makes a huge difference for me.
Thanks for reading, Abbey!
I love the ideas of a gratitude list. I will try that!
Kelsey W. says
Thank you so much for this post, I am behind this 10000%! I turned 31 in March and it is so crazy looking back 10 years earlier and realizing how much priorities change. Something I’ve been doing lately to be happier has been seeing a therapist to help with my anxiety, and to keep my depression under wraps. You’re absolutely right that it helps to have an unbiased cheerleader in your corner and mine makes me feel so good after our monthly sessions! One of the things on the list I want to do is have social media-free days! Scrolling consumes so much of my time and I rather be outside or reading. Right now I am struggling with my appearance and self-confidence. I am about 50 lbs heavier than I should be, but can’t seem to find the motivation to lose it. It has stopped me from reconnecting with old friends because I don’t want them to see what I look like now. Other than that, things in life are going really well! It’s just the one thing I can’t seem to get a handle on.
I hope you have a great weekend! 🙂 – Kelsey
Hi, Kelsey! 💜 You’re so right about that. The priorites are always shifting each stage of life.
I’m glad you’re seeing a therapist. They are truly the best! It took me a few times to find the right one.
I think sometimes when we can’t find motivation or feel like losing weight becomes stressful or a chore, we just have to let it go for a bit until you’re mentally ready. I definitely understand where you are coming from though. Dieting or thinking about weighloss is draining. The best thing is finding ways to make small changes each day. Maybe a ten minute walk, maybe a healthy meal with a good dessert, just balance that makes it all easier. I know how it is though! ♥️ Hang in there!
Mo Larson says
Thank you for your honesty. You are a very wise young lady and a very beautiful one too….I would love to hear all about your teeth straightening journey….I think that would be an interesting read…Hod bless you sweetie😘
Thank you, Mo! 💜
This is such an honest and helpful post! Would love to hear you talk about your journey with anxiety in a YouTube video! I also love your clean with me videos, they’re so motivating. Hope you have an amazing weekend!
Thanks, Katherine! I do need to get back into videos and I think I will after Kyle goes back to the office and once the wedding is over!
There are some really great reminders here for me – and with perfect timing, too – I just turned 32 and am starting to feel like I’m realllly into my 30s now and not just faking it 😅.
One more that I would add in, that I really need to do myself and am not preaching at all about as I have NOT found a balance yet – is seperating yourself as a mother (I have a few kids!) from you as a person.
For me – being a mom has come to define me – and while it’s what I am most proud of and what brings me the most joy in my life, in my 30s now I am hoping to find a balance where I can also just be me without the mom part sometimes.
If anyone else here has figured it all out, please share!
Great post, got me thinking, thanks Taralynn. X
Hahaha I can totally relate to that! Still not convied im 30 yet lol
I have heard so many people say they’ve struggled with that. But I think you need to recognize it and find yourself the best you can. Set some time to do the things you love and ask for help in order to go do those things. You never want to lose yourself! Even if that means a few hours a week catching up with a friend at a restaurant or working on a project you’ve been putting off. I’m sure I’ll relate hard to this one day. I’m sure someone will be able to read your comment and come in with some good advice!!
xo xo xo
Let me be that person 🙂 we have moved to Spain with my husband and 2 children, away from family and friends, right before the pandemic kicked in. Having no friends and family around, quarantined in our house, with the 2 toddlers at home 24/7, was (is?) Really a tough cookie and it is difficult to forget that we will soon get to know new people, be able to have the kids socialize too, and travel! Taralynn is soooooo right. Self care!!! During the quarantine, I was doing the shopping rounds alone, and wow, it felt great. I’m also an advocate of almost daily hot baths, alone, reading blogs and websites that motivate me to cook healthy and do exercise (thank you, Taralynn).
This was such a meaningful and valuable post! I could do with drinking more water – it is something I really want to put effort into. I deleted all my social media about 9 years ago and I can’t tell you how happy I am that it’s not in my life. I understand it can have a purpose, especially if you need it for business purposes, but when the negative impacts outweigh the positives, I think it’s time to reconsider its value in our lives. I also think an important thing is to seek and foster healthy relationships. Having a healthy romantic relationship and friendships can really support your overall happiness (especially mental health).
You look so beautiful in these pictures!
Thanks so much for posting this. I may not be in my thirties anymore, but some feelings never change!
I am struggling with donating the clothes that no longer fit me or my lifestyle (and I have a lot), but I’m slowly working at it.
I’m glad you are happy with your new smile. I’m guessing you got veneers. About 2 yrs. ago I got veneers because my two front teeth were a bit chipped and had some cracks, so it was only a matter of time. I didn’t want to have implants if the worse happened, so I finally opted for veneers. I had a tooth gap that I’ve always loved and embraced it as part of my personality, and told my dentist I wanted to keep it. Final result: I still have a slight gap, but the angle is different. I don’t quite feel like I did before because I look a little different.
Thanks for being real, girl!
Thank you so much 😊
I didn’t end up doing veneers but just a addition of resin to each side of my four front teeth. It was a super small fix but it was something I should have done years ago. ♥️
Thank you Taralynn for this post and being vulnerable to write it. I’ve read your blog for years but have never commented. These words are just what I needed today.
I’m 32 and constantly comparing my life to others and where I think my life “should” be. Specifically when it comes to not having kids yet. But I am trying to sit back and remind myself that things will happen the way they are meant to be.
Thank you for always being a bright spot in my day and bringing joy to your readers! It always makes me happy to see a new blog post pop up from you!
Thank you, Nicole ♥️ You are exactly where you’re supposed to be in this moment!
I’m sorry to hear about your anxiety. I remember I was so stressed the year leading up to my wedding. All the anxious thoughts and worries would circle through my head like hungry sharks. I remember struggling to go to sleep because of it. One night I had a panic attack and I said enough is enough. I hired a wedding coordinator and didn’t look back. Other things that helped me were replacing coffee with oat straw tea or reishi cacao (I am an herb enthusiast) and exercise (which you already do :). Best of luck and I promise it gets better.
1. What is something you’ve been doing to be happier?
Letting myself relax and be a kid again. It doesn’t come easily to me. I’ve been enjoying painting on the weekends and trying DIY things like making candles. Giving myself permission to play and have fun has changed my life.
2. What is one thing on the list you could apply to your life?
Definitely #2- accept that not everyone is going to like you. I am a recovering people pleaser and I am still learning to let it go.
3. What are you currently struggling with right now?
I have piles of books in my office that are unread because I’m kind of a reading addict. I have every intention of reading them, but I keep buying new books without reading the old ones! It’s time to cut myself off 😉
Charmaine Ng | Architecture & Lifestyle Blog says
So cute! Thanks for the tips Taralynn, glad you’re enjoying your 30s! ❤️✨
Charmaine Ng | Architecture & Lifestyle Blog
This is such a great blog post Tara! 🙂 I’ve come to many of the same conclusions myself. I’ve been reading your blog for over ten years now (since I was a teenager) and I’ve always admired you. I think you are my very favorite blogger! You seem like such a cool person and I feel like we would be friends in real life if we ever met haha! Now, for your questions:
1. What is something you’ve been doing to be happier?
Walking or hiking for at least 1 hour a day outside. Also staying away from processed food/sugar and trying to get enough sleep. And playing with my kitties. ❤️
2. What is one thing on the list you could apply to your life?
Pretty much all of them! 😁 I feel the exact same way as you as far as alcohol goes too.
3. What are you currently struggling with right now?
Work has been pretty stressful lately.
Hope you have a great weekend! 🙂
♥️ ♥️ Thank you for sharing that! It’s crazy you’ve been here for over ten years. wow where does the time go!!
I’ve been reading your blog for the past eight years and this post is by far my favorite thing you have written. I’ve read it 3 times now since yesterday so I could gather my thoughts for a comment.
I’m really struck by the point of friendships having an expiration date. I feel like no one bats an eye when a romantic relationship ends for whatever the reason may be, but we are expected to hold onto friendships at all costs. People grow apart in these relationships too. I can’t remember where I read this but it was “some people are only meant to take you part of the way on your journey” and it really resonated with me. I was thinking about a boyfriend at the time but after reading your point it definitely applies there too.
The past year has been really introspective for me, I’ve been home with my thoughts, hopes, and fears for a whole year. Being unemployed has actually been a blessing. My job/industry was very toxic for me. I’m working to find something that can be emotionally undaunting and still pay the bills. I honestly don’t understand why people are so awful to one another in work situations.
This morning I took the time to go through my social media and remove all the people and brands that make me feel “less than”. Some were hard to remove at first but I think it will be good for me in the long run. I completely deleted Reddit because I loved commenting on the beauty threads, unlike you, makeup is my main form of self care. I love it and have since I was little but I’ve noticed I tend to want more when I’m feeling lost, And I’m not wearing much these days!
Again, thank you for the beautiful post. I’m going to put down my phone and go enjoy this NC rain. (By the way, one of the best decisions I’ve made, moving to NC, was because I fell in love with it from your blog.)
Thank you so much ♥️ 8 years! WOW.
You are so right about the friendships. That quote is so true and I think sometimes we feel as if we have to hold friendships or we failed. It’s not that at all.
I’m so happy you got out of a toxic work situation. That is so hard to do! I definitely understand what you mean about wanting more when it comes to makeup. I do that with a few things in my life as well.
I hope you have the most amazing weekend ♥️
This is so spot on! So weird, I turn 30 in a couple weeks and it’s weird how much I resonate with this list! I kept finding myself comparing myself to others and feeling like I wasn’t good enough or successful enough for some of my friends and it was nothing they did or said that made me feel that way, it was just my own insecurities. Once I was able to recognize that about myself, I felt a lot better about our friendships and started working on myself more. I also feel like I’m finally in the right mindset to exercise for health instead of a nagging feeling to lose weight. Love everything about this list! and gorgeous photos as always!
I just entered my thirties and so many of these points are things I’m going through or things I’ve realized the importance of. It’s so interesting to know that people all over the world can still share similar perspectives and go through the same things depending on the stage of life. Thank you for making this post!
Lauren S. says
I love this post! I would love a post about your teeth…I have been thinking about fixing the gap in my teeth but wondering if it’s worth the money/effort.
Well I thought that for a long time! I always thought I had to get veneers but my dentist recommended resin to fix the sides. My insurance covered almost all of it. Definitely talk to your dentist! 🙂
I most definitely need to get rid of clothes that don’t fit anymore. I’ve pretty much been going makeup free for a while now, at least face makeup, I still put on mascara to look alive, but since I have to wear a mask at work I figured what’s the point? I know I am struggling with trying to be more organized and active. Most of the time on my days off I just want to lay on the sofa and binge watch Discovery+! But here’s to a more productive week ahead.
You are pretty smart!
All of this is so true! I think that we naturally give to others and we live in a society where we’re often made to feel guilty if we take time to ourselves and to take care of ourselves. It’s exhausting! After going through a very traumatic divorce, I learned how to put myself first and take that time to take care of myself. It’s ok for us to say “no” to things…it’s ok for us to treat ourselves…it’s ok for us to NOT glorify being busy. When we’re ok and in a good place, everything else falls into place so much easier.
I read your post twice and to be honest I didn’t realize how much I needed to read it and how much I can identity. I am also starting my thirties and I’m going through the same things. I’ve already applied some changes to be happier, for example I learned to let go on some people and to not force anything.
I think I’m on a very good way. I found exercises which I truly enjoy and I was never a sport person so this is good, I go make up free few times per week (something I wouldn’t do few years ago), I also try to get rid of things I don’t need and I find pleasure in small things like a road trip somewhere close, my favorite coffee etc. It’s difficult for me to not compare myself to others, I still have to work on it. I am also learning to put myself first and I think this is the hardest one. I definitely should find more time for self-care, at least one hour per day to read a book, take a bath or whatever, instead of doing things I don’t necessary want to. Sometimes I feel like I have to go out and see that person because I promised I would come and then between hanging out here and there, there is no time left for myself..
Having social media free days is also something I am working on and every time I do it I feel great! Because this is where I mostly compare myself with other people and it’s not very healthy. So as you can see, I am already applying many things from your list and I will definitely add some more!
Thank you so much for this post and for being who you are. I really appreciate your honesty and after so many years of reading your blog I feel like if I was talking to a friend and this is very nice 🙂 So thank you and please never stop blogging! You’ve been my favorite blogger for like 7 years already 🙂
Big hug <3
Jenny Kempen says
This is a great post!! I have also found that journaling and meditating when I feel spikes of anxiety come on has really helped me. That along with reading – I have recently been to a few antique stores and finding books written in a completely different time period seems to bring me to peace. I am assuming this genre is a personal preference, but it brings me to a happy place 🙂
Thanks for the post!
I love all of these! I turn 30 in a couple of months and it’s so hard to come to terms with some of these. Since making some of these changes, I have never felt more secure or happy with myself and my life. Still working on the social media and the organizing, but I already feel so much relief. 🙂
I would absolutely love to travel more but there is a pandemic. In province in Canada we cannot travel at all (not even a weekend away) and I am finding zero travel for the last 14 months has been difficult. I work at a food bank and level of need in the community keeps growing, as does my burn out and the burn out of my colleagues. Anxiety is huge right now for all of us. Cannot wait until it is our turn to get the vaccine – that’ll be the one thing I can “fix” 🙂 thank you for sharing on the blog, I always appreciate when you are so honest with us.
I love all your tips so much! I highlighted a few to remember for later <3 thanks for sharing them!
This post was so helpful!! I turn 30 in July and have struggled with most things on this list. Something that’s really helped me is writing down what I’m grateful each day and also trying to do yoga everyday. My biggest goal as I turn 30 is exercise and eating better for my mental and physical health, stop comparing to others, and organizing every aspect of my life!