Have you ever been nervous about making a decision? How do we know if it’s the right one or a big mistake? I know it’s all about instinct, but what if our instincts are wrong? I’m one of those people that likes rash decisions. I make them quick and sometimes too quick. If I have too much time to think about it, I become wish-washy and go back and fourth with my decision. It’s one of the most stressful things I do to myself. My dad always says “if it doesn’t feel right, don’t do it”, but sometimes that doesn’t apply. I get high levels of anxiety about making decisions and that’s why I used to let people make them for me.
I have been getting a lot of questions about how I went about making the decision to live on my own in North Carolina, deciding if someone isn’t the right one, and other life decisions.
Lately, I’ve been all about the pros and cons list. That’s what helps me weigh out the bad decisions.
Another questions I get a lot is how I manage my money and how do I let myself spend. Again, I’m all about the list.
(save and print)
Danielle Wooding @ New England Daughter says
This is really smart, especially pairing the two list types together, that way you erase a lot of assumptions about what you think things will be like and break it down by practicalities which, while never fun to contemplate, are extremely important.
Kat says
I’m all about the pros and cons list too. I use it for basically everything. I’ll never make a major life decision without one!!!
Livi says
Great lists! keeping organized definitely helps with decisions and money!
Kerry says
Your post made me cry today. I. do. the. same. thing. Period. I try to trust my instincts, but I always second guess them – for some reason. I recently made a huge decision and it ended up not working out, however, it’s teaching me humility and to not fear the process. I don’t think any decision based on truth and good is wrong. We must grow. If we stay in our comfort zones forever, we won’t learn more about our purpose here on Earth. You’re amazing – give life a try, it won’t disappoint! 🙂
Emily says
I pro/con all the time. It is really difficult to argue against which one out weighs the other. Thanks for the money saving tip though! That I do struggle with… I just bought my second Liveashore tank haha, but that’s worth it 😉
alyssa says
I typically don’t get anxiety when it comes to making a decision, however lately I’ve been wishy-washy as well. Love the list idea. Something I wouldn’t normally do, i like it.
Laura says
Not sure if you are into TED talks but my husband and I have had to make a lot of tough choices and this talk opened my eyes just a little bit more. Wishing you the best!
http://www.ted.com/talks/ruth_chang_how_to_make_hard_choices
W says
For saving and bills I would highly recommend the Mint App. It links to your bank account and keeps track of your spending habits and you can set limits and alerts to help let you know when you are about to break a spending limit.
Also, as a general rule of thumb depending on how you are paid you either save 10% of post tax income or if you make a bonus on salary you save your entire bonus and then spend your salary. Also, since you’re now in NC I would recommend getting a bank account with Charles Schwab or Suntrust because both reimburse you for ATM fees.
Brianna says
Great post! I am a very indecisive person. When it comes to making important decisions or changes I always make a Pro&Con list. 🙂
Tasha says
Hey Taralynn!
I just wanted to say I think you’re so brave for even posting what you have been about the major life changes going on right now! It’s hard going through those things, and sometimes even harder sharing with others. It sounds like you are really enjoying this next chapter in your life though and that is awesome! What a fun new adventure you have instore for you!
Gwen says
Hey Girl!
Love the lists! I’ve been doing a lot of lists recently too, trying to make big life choices and manage my time and money well. Love reading your blog and seeing that I’m not the only one out there. Thanks for not painting your life like a fairy tale and blogging like a real person!
jessica says
Ahh Tara I needed this today! I recently got out of a 3 year relationship, graduated college and now I’m moving to a town outside of charlotte to start my nursing career in Aug. Every. single. day. I make lists and my favorite is the pros and cons. One of the hardest things can be change and making life-changing decisions. I just want to say thank you for sharing and there are so many of us out there that are going through the same things. I feel like you and I are a lot alike in that we are independent, strong-willed and we love serving others, but we often forget about our ourselves in the midst of it all. And the worst feeling is the feeling of defeat, or as if you’ve let someone down, including yourself. I just want you to know I am very proud of your accomplishments and I know you are going to do great things!
Kristin Cook says
I very much appreciate your comment, Taralynn, about how sometimes the “if it feels wrong, don’t do it” doesn’t apply. Sometimes something can feel so true or right, but in reality, its not. And vice versa. Our feelings are not perfect and therefore, they cannot always be our compass. When we have anxiety, it skews our reality and feelings. Thanks for mentioning that. A lot of people don’t get that.